Figuring Out Girls: A Short Guide to the Difference of Guys and Girls

Let’s face it, when it comes to interactions between guys and girls, it can get confusing. Guys are often baffled by girls; the way they think and how their minds work. Frankly, ladies feel the same way about men, too. Guys and Girls think in different ways. From the way they act, to the way they problem solve, to the way they communicate, both genders tend to approach situations in different ways. This difference can lead to some confusing, and at times even frustrating interactions, which makes dating a complicated thing to do. Well boys, you have come to the right place, because this article is going to help you sort out those confusions you have about girls.

Guys are Frank, Girls are Passive

In general, this is one of the biggest differences between guys and girls. Guys are known to be very straight forward. They tell it like it is and if they have a problem with something or someone, they show it. Girls on the other hand think in a very different way. If they have a problem with something, they usually will not be frank and say so. Rather they tend to skirt around an issue. Maybe it is because they do not like confrontation, or maybe they want you to be preceptive enough to pick up on it on your own. Though you may think it is practical and obvious that being frank is the easiest way to deal with thing, many girls do not see it that way. So even though you may asker her multiple times what is wrong and receive a “I am fine”, know that most of the times, girls will not be direct with you. The same goes for good situations as well. Girls are not always direct when it comes to telling a guy how they feel and showing definite interest. Girls tend to put a lot of thought into their interactions and will sometimes overthink things. In turn it can be hard to read what is really going through her head and know how she is actually feeling.

So how do you deal with a girl who is being passive, especially passive aggressive? In a moment of anger or frustration, she will likely want you to respond in a way that will feed the fire. She may push your buttons to evoke a reaction. This is just the way girls handle these emotions sometimes. The best way to deal with these situations is to put away your pride and ask her what is really going on. Start off by telling her you care about her and that you value honest and open communication in a relationship. Then continue to ask her if there is any other reason she is angry. Also let her know that you want to work to help fix it. Do not condescend to her and make her feel crazy; this is bound to make her even more mad. Rather try to have a conversation and let her know that you are listening.

Care and Attention

When it comes down to it, the root of most problems a girl brings up has something to do with care and attention. All a girl wants from a guy she is interested is to know he cares and has his attention. When it seems like he is not thinking about her or puts this attention on another girl, it can make her feel insecure in herself and the relationship. Often times if a girl does not feel like you are paying her enough attention, she will project her frustration on to something else. Girls need reassurance of a guy’s feeling towards her. The issue can be not that a guy doesn’t care or think about a woman, but that he is not showing it enough. If you want to avoid fights related to this, and give your lady some piece of mind, then put in a little effort and show her you care. This does not need to be some grand gesture. You do not have to buy her flowers every week or drop a ton of money on expensive jewelry. Simply send her a random text in the middle of the day or write her a note for her to find when she wakes up. Just make sure she knows you care. Showing these simple signs of affection can mean the world to a girl, and it gives you some extra brownie points.

The Little Things

As mentioned above, all really girls really need to feel secure in their relationship is to feel like her man cares and thinks about her. She is likely thinking of you often and would like to know the feeling is mutual. Again, you do not have to do anything dramatic, but let her know that she is on your mind and that you care. Most girls will tell you it is the little things that count. The things that show thoughtfulness and consideration are so important to a girl. Whether she is your girlfriend, or a friend you have an interest in, showing her affection in small ways is a great step to furthering your relationship and gaining her interest. Here are a few small things you can do to make her day.

  • Text Her: You do not have to start a full-blown conversation, but something as simple as texting her good morning or good night can make her day and let her know you are thinking of her.
  • Sticky Notes: Another way to make her smile is to simply write a cute little message on a sticky note and put it somewhere where she will find later. Write about a nickname or inside joke and place it on her bathroom mirror or in a book she is reading. When she finds it, she is going to be so happily surprised.
  • Unexpected treats: Showing up randomly with a little unexpected treat is a great way to brighten a girl’s mood. Think to what she loves. Does she have a favorite kind of chocolate or dessert? Is she a tea or coffee drinker in the morning? Greeting her with a random treat is an inexpensive and easy way to show you care.
  • Clean: If your girl is even a bit of a neat freak, spontaneously cleaning is a great way to make her happy. It is one less thing for her to do and will put her at ease being in a clean space. This can be as simple as making the bed before you leave in the morning or washing the dishes at the end of a meal. It will take just a few minutes out of your day but will make a big difference in hers.

The key to this piece of advice is to do these things randomly. It is one thing to show up with flowers or chocolate on her birthday or Valentine’s day when you are obligated to do something, but it will be that much more special if you do it on a day when she is least expecting it. This is also a great way to get the attention of a girl you like.


Now you know more about how a girl’s mind works. Use these tips to your advantage to impress that girl you care about and make her feel special.


Theodore created PracticalPsychology in his mother's basement after quitting university at age 19. From there, a dream was born to change lives by helping people understand how their brain works. By applying practical psychological principles to our lives, we can get a jumpstart on the path of self-improvement. 1,500,000 Youtube subscribers later, and that dream continues strong!

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