How to Ask for a Girl’s Phone Number: Easy Strategies that Work in 95% of Cases

You approached a girl, she seems to like you, and the discussion is moving towards you asking for her number.

Do you start getting nervous just by imagining yourself in this scenario? If yes, don’t be mortified; it’s normal and it happens to lots of guys, from high school boys to adult men.

The nervousness comes from not knowing how to ask for a girl’s phone number. Should you go straightforward and simply put the question out there? Or maybe you should be clever about it and try to make a funny joke?

The truth is that there is no universal bullet-proof strategy that can teach you how to ask for a girl’s phone number. However, there are several ways to approach the situation, and I will tell you about the ones that proved most successful.

I will describe different scenarios, so make sure to choose the one that fits your current situation. But, regardless of the strategy you choose, pick one that is more likely to get her to agree, and give you the number. Don’t go for elaborate strategies you see online; keep it simple, and be confident.

Tip #1: Don’t Ask for Her Number!

The best way to get her phone number is to not ask for it!

It’s confusing, I know, but let me explain. If you say “I was wondering, maybe I could get your number. And, if you want, maybe we can hang out sometime” or “Sooo, can I get your phone number? ” it shows you’re not confident. And maybe you’re not sure that she wants to give you her number.

This is a big turn off for girls.

The correct formulation should sound like a command (without any aggressiveness) “Here, put your number in my phone” or “That’s really awesome!  I got to hang out with you sometime. Put your number in my phone and I’ll give you a call

If you don’t like this approach, you can play it cool and say “You seem like a really cool person. Let me get your number so we can hang out sometime”.

The trick is to look confident and casual when you formulate the question/command. Keep eye contact, smile, and always, always have the phone ready. You don’t want her to be saying “Sure!” and then start looking for your phone. The moment will be over and the situation will head towards awkward.

When to Ask for the Number

There is no perfect moment, so you have to feel it.

The important thing is to never start with asking the number, but you shouldn’t wait until the end of your conversation either.

It should be at a high point in the chat, when you see she likes your approach and maybe would be interested in learning more. Usually your gut feeling is pretty precise, so if you feel the discussion reached a high point, find a way to steer the conversation towards phone numbers.

Hint: a high point in the interaction is when the girl is laughing, the energy is good, and you’re both having a good time.

But before you ask for the number, check if you should. Do you have a connection? Is she closer to you than when you started talking? Is she laughing at your jokes?

If all these answers are yes and you would like to see more of her, then sure, ask for her number! The ides here is that it’s not just about how to ask for a girl’s phone number, it’s also about if you should ask for the number.

After all, you wouldn’t want to go through so much trouble, and not get something pleasant out of it, right?

Some Girls Don’t Like Giving their Number

Some girls like to play it safe and don’t give their number, but they have nothing against getting yours. In this case, you can play it safe. This means give her your number, and wait for her to call.

But safe is boring and there’s a better way to do it.

Being confident and funny is always the winning combination so keep things light and cozy. For instance, if you feel you’ll get a big fat No when you ask, first test the water. Ask her for her phone and when she asks why, say “I want to see if you have my number”.

She will laugh and two things can happen here: she’ll hand you her phone so you can give her the number or she’ll ask for your phone and give you her number. This strategy works because it allows the girls to choose what she wants to do.

Another approach is where you ask for her phone, in order to give her your number. Say something like “I really enjoy talking to you, I’ll give you my number so we can chat some more. Let me see your phone”. If she likes you, she’ll hand you her phone.

If you think the situation allows it (she seems really into you), you can go to her message app and send yourself a cute text. Make it funny and flirty.

If She Says Yes

She likes you and wants to know more, so of course she’ll give you the number!

Make sure you have the phone ready, the contact app open, and you can even input her number. All she has to do is insert the digits and hit Save.

Hand her your phone as you’re saying you need her to introduce it. Also, at this stage in the discussion, you can move closer to her, as if it were to check what she’s doing on your phone. It’s a nice opportunity to touch her (as if by accident) and see how you feel in close proximity.

Once she puts the number in your phone, send her a flirty text. Something like “Hey, it’s Tim, the guy with the killer smile ;)”. At this moment in the discussion she has your number and you’ve already opened a new channel of communication: texting.

If you can’t text right away, don’t wait too long for this. You should send her a text when you get home or the second day.

Should I Call or Text?

Yes, this is the big question!

You learned all there is about how to get a girl’s phone number and you were successful in your efforts (congrats!). But what’s the next step?

Well, in my opinion, you should keep things casual and do a bit of texting. It shows you are interested, but confident enough to play it cool for a while. It’s OK to send her a text as soon as possible after getting the number, in order to establish a connection. However, it’s not OK to harass her with messages all day long. Keep it funny and short.

Finally, when the time to ask her for a date comes, I am a big believer in calling the gal. It gives the date deeper meaning and shows you really want to spend some time with her.

Learn to Deal with Rejection

I am sure you were expecting to read about rejection at some point. I decided to address this topic at the end, because you shouldn’t start with the idea that you’ll get rejected. However, if this happens, you have to know how to handle it.

First, the idea of rejection is one of the reasons why you are so nervous in the first place. What is she says no? Well, that’s about it. She says no, and you move on to better things. Nothing worse can happen at this stage.

You also must keep in mind that, even if a girl agrees to give you her number, it doesn’t necessarily mean you will be going out with her. Asking for someone’s number is not a proposal towards a serious relationship. It’s just a way to continue a pleasant interaction and see if it leads somewhere.

So, keep it casual and light, and be confident in your own strengths. It will give you that “je ne sais quoi” she won’t be able to resist!

In Conclusion

Knowing how to ask for a girl’s phone number should be a skill in every modern man’s arsenal. It doesn’t require too much from you, but it can be so rewarding if done right. So, don’t be afraid to get yourself out there and test your power of attraction. You may get a few rejections on the line, but hey, that’s how you grow!


Theodore created PracticalPsychology in his mother's basement after quitting university at age 19. From there, a dream was born to change lives by helping people understand how their brain works. By applying practical psychological principles to our lives, we can get a jumpstart on the path of self-improvement. 1,500,000 Youtube subscribers later, and that dream continues strong!

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