Impressing a Girl Using the Code of Chivalry

How do you go about impressing a girl using the code of chivalry, these days?

This is certainly not an easy question. You’ll want to make sure that you don’t cross the invisible line from which acting chivalrous goes into the territory of being a doormat. Sometimes nice isn’t so nice.

So yes! There needs to be a balance when impressing a girl using the code of chivalry!

Gone are the days when acting chivalrous means having an old English notion of the birds and bees. Truth be told, most women were not treated very well back then.

Just to give you a clearer picture, girls who’ve known how it is to be treated like a lady back in the day were usually only ones who were rich or were daughters of landed lords. Yes, the girls that were not from a genteel background were often treated like livestock. That’s certainly not what you want to do, right?

Things have changed when it comes to applying the code of chivalry in the modern context.

Being chivalrous towards members of the opposite sex these days means respecting who they are as a person and not as though they’re a precious ‘object’ that isn’t capable of thought.

Think about it: how can you go on impressing a girl using the code of chivalry when you’re so detached from what women really want and how they want it? You have to understand how women think to really pull this off!

You see, impressing a girl using the code of chivalry back in the day is actually mostly a display of “I’m such a good guy” mindset more than an attitude of respect towards women. It was all sugar-coated as courtly love and code of Knights but the way it looks good in romance novels is not going to fly the same way in the real world today.

Instead of focusing on the things that you can do when impressing a girl using the code of chivalry (which would require a book, to be honest), a bigger emphasis needs to be placed on the things that you shouldn’t do…so we’ll take a look at the 5 commandments of impressing a girl using the code of chivalry today, okay?

Here goes!

The 5 Commandments of Impressing a Girl Using the Code of Chivalry

Thou shall not lie just to make her feel good

As much as there are things that girls like to hear from men, the last thing they want to hear are lies.

When she asks you if a certain outfit makes her fat, tell her the truth! This won’t be a problem as long as you word it properly.

If the outfit does make her look fat, say that it emphasizes her flaws or fits her curves the wrong way…then volunteer to help her choose which outfit fits best. Bonus part? You get to have the privilege of watching a private fashion show!

Thou shall not decide things for her unless she explicitly asked you to

You want your girl to feel great? How about you ask her what she likes instead of assuming things for her?

This is why some men are baffled why their girl isn’t looking too happy when they thought that what they did was to make their girl feel special by ordering food for her, choose her clothes for her, tell her that he wants her to wear her hair a certain way, and so on.

Do you want to be your girl’s knight in shining armor? Ask her what she wants. Be interested in what she thinks. Recognize that she’s got a brain of her own.

Thou shall not disrespect other people

Just because you’re nice towards your girl doesn’t mean that you’re all clear when it comes it being a gentleman. What she wants to see is that you have a beautiful knightly heart.

How do you achieve this?

Be considerate towards service people: open doors for the elderly, do not badmouth your exes no matter how crazy your backstory with them is, be a man of your words – little things count big time when impressing a girl using the code of chivalry!

Thou shall not actively do something that will hurt her or anyone

Your actions speak volumes about who you are as a person. If you truly want to try impressing a girl using the code of chivalry, you can take a page from history and try to selectively implement the essence of that code – which is to act in a manner that considers the welfare and feelings of others.

Making sure that you do the above isn’t that complicated. Just practice thinking things over before reacting or going through something. Avoid acting out of an emotional response. Instead, try to give yourself time to think things through.

Before you know it, your new sense of self-awareness will carry over to other aspects of your life. You avoiding hurting other people through rushed decisions and actions will be part of who you are. This goes beyond impressing a girl using the code of chivalry, though. You’ll be dazzling her by being a fine example of a man of solid character, better than any knight!

Thou shall not treat her as a damsel in distress

It’s one thing to be there when your girl needs you, but it’s another if you’re being too overprotective or too clingy.

Women today want to receive the same regard that you would give other males, so recognize the fact that she’s perfectly capable of handling things on her own just like you can.

This will probably be a bit difficult for you because you care about your lady and want to help her in any way possible, right?

It is part of the male psyche to be protective; however, you have to recognize that oftentimes, being supportive is the best help you can do more so when you’re impressing a girl using the code of chivalry.

How so? Because men and women think differently!

Whereas men want to act on a solution as soon as they thought of it, women often like mulling over specific details. You can say that they do like to stop and smell the flowers even when the solution they want is staring them in the face.

Oftentimes, the best that you can do is to chill and listen. Remember, the second commandment to impressing a girl using the code of chivalry – thou shall not decide things for her!

Helpful Tips When Impressing a Girl Using The Code of Chivalry

  1. Ask for her opinion on things that interest you. Women find it chivalrous when you treat her as your lady, as someone you value in your life.
  2. Open doors for her…but only if she’s comfortable with this display of chivalry.
  3. Give her what she appreciates even on a normal day. This goes beyond flowers and chocolates. Sometimes you volunteering to make dinner or surprising her with a gift card to her favorite store counts more (because this shows you pay attention).
  4. Talk to her… and don’t just say things that you think will impress her. Let her know how you think and feel. Let her know you want to carry her bags and pull out chairs for her not because you think she’s weak but because you love making her feel comfortable. Then listen to what she says.
  5. Ask her what things men can do when impressing a girl using the code of chivalry. Be sure to bring this up casually, like when you’re watching a period film. Remember to take notes!

Note that the above is not an exhaustive list of the things that you can do when impressing a girl using the code of chivalry. They’re just examples to give you some idea on how to be a modern knight who’s a real champion for your lady.

As you’ve probably noticed by now, this write-up is quite different from other resources on the same topic. This is because this was written in such a way that teaches you how women think rather than just telling you what to do. Want to know more about how women think and the psychology of attraction? Check out our other articles!


Theodore created PracticalPsychology in his mother's basement after quitting university at age 19. From there, a dream was born to change lives by helping people understand how their brain works. By applying practical psychological principles to our lives, we can get a jumpstart on the path of self-improvement. 1,500,000 Youtube subscribers later, and that dream continues strong!

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